> "Firebird"
> > You have been most helpful, with the site and taking time to answer
> > my questions.
> >
> > I know how things work now. The mood of the INS officer at the POE
> > is the important
> > factor. Lying will be punished.
>
> Nope. Everything is factors in, your previous stays, the country you
> came from,
> everything. And yes, lying will be punished. It's never good to lie to
> the INS.
>
> >
> > As I made clear: My intent IS to marry.
>
> Tell that to the INS inspector at the POE and they WILL turn you back.
>
> > That is: I love her, and want tto get married.
>
> Then they'll tell you get a K-1 visa, because that is what it's for.
> Tourist visas
> are not for getting married and adjusting status. That's why so many
> young women from
> all over the world get denied for tourist visas. Every applicant for a
> tourist visa
> is presumed to be an intending immigrant. It's up to you to show that
> you're not. Of
> course if you get a tourist visa or enter on it and are in fact an
> intending
> immigrant, you have shown that you have fraudulently obtained or
> abused the visa.
> THAT is where the problem is.
>
> > I am from Holland, and the standard of living here is pretty much
> > the same. Could
> > be a bit worse, or a bit better, I don't know.
>
> That doesn't matter. They turn back Canadians at the canadian border
> if they tell the
> inspector that they are entering to marry a US citizen.
>
> > I am not saying the states is better or worse, but I have enough
> > chances here.
> >
> > If I tell the INS officer that I have no job in Holland, will he
> > look at that as a
> > very bad thing?
>
> Yes, probably.
>
> >
> > The very truth is: My (ex-)boss likes me a lot, and thinks I am a
> > good employee. My
> > job was specialized and he still hasn't found anyone to replace
> > me. I couldn't get my job back now, because it is slow in the
> > beginning of the
> > year. And because I want to leave for the states again, it was
> > useless to hire
> > me during that slow time only.
> >
> > If I were to stay longer I would get a contract immediately, and
> > he'd hire
> > me today.
> >
> > Will the INS officer take time to listen to this, and what will he
> > think of this?
> > Will he be like "yeah yeah, whatever. Sure, man, whatever you say!"
> > and then send
> > me back to Holland?"
>
> Probably. It all depends on what they ask. Sometimes they ask nothing,
> sometimes they
> grill you.
>
> >
> > I have gone to the States twice before for 6 months and it was hard
> > to get through
> > the INS then. The second time they went through all my stuff.
> >
> > I had letters in there that said: "I'd like to go to work, but it's
> > impossible" to
> > my fiancee, who has to carry the entire financial burden alone. They
> > found 3 screws
> > and a screwdriver and said "AHA! You're working as a computer guy,
> > aren't ya!" And
> > I'm not. I like computers and fix them.
> >
> > But I had also brought my two harddisks. I needed something to screw
> > them in my
> > fiancee's computer with.
> >
> > After their heavy suspicion they then decided to let me go. But I
> > was not wrong
> > then. I was right. I did right. I didn't lie. Even when they asked
> > if I was to get
> > married, I answered truthfully saying "I'd like to get married, but
> > we can't
> > because I don't have a visa. If I do it the wrong way I get deported
> > for 5 years."
> > The officer then said "How do you know this?" as if he really did
> > not want me to
> > know this stuff. I said "INS website" I said we were going to get a
> > K-1, but not
> > yet because it was going to take too long, and we couldn't wait and
> > stay away from
> > eachother that long.
>
> >
> > If things were calm and painless, I'd wait my time.
> >
> > I have arguments for the INS that I could never use. I could say:
> > "The reson
> > these rules exist is: poor people come in to take advantage of the
> > USA an get
> > married to commit fraude, to stay. The K-1 Visa is a 'wait-to-be-
> > sure system so
> > people will know what they are doing better. But since I have
> > allready known her
> > for a long time (a year last december) and been with her for 6
> > months, it is
> > unlikely, and definately unprovable that I have bad intent. At least
> > that is what
> > the statistics say. The truth is: I want her, not America. I could
> > care less
> > about America, I have my own country, culture, family, friends. All
> > that I had to
> > give up allready, because she has kids she cannot leave behind. I
> > came to the USA
> > because I love her, and specifically because of this, love, these
> > rules exist.
> > That many people take advantage of these rules because "love" is
> > abstract and
> > unprovable, is not my fault."
>
> They won't give a shit about what you say. It's up to them to allow
> you or deny you.
> As a matter of fact they'll probably deny you entry because you've
> been here two
> times before and are now giving them lip on a third entry. Not good.
>
> Even if they do not do you anything at the POE, your words could come
> back to haunt
> you at your interview. Don't be a cowboy. Cowboys get deported and
> banned. Do it the
> right way and you'll save yourself a whole lot of potential stress.
> >
> > In the end: America stands for freedom, personal freedom, the
> > freedom to do as you
> > choose, yet it is clear about tolerance for criminality. That is
> > where freedom
> > stops. :)
> >
> > That is the way it is supposed to be. It would be easy for the
> > government to say:
> > No. No marriages. Too much hassle. Go away, we don't need this.
> >
> > I am grateful that the States grants me these rights. Without it I'd
> > be lost.
> >
> >
> > Will they understand?
> >
> > Anyway, this is not easy. I have a lot of adversity to battle
> > already. She has
> > mental problems and a furious ex-husband. 4 kids with mental health
> > problems
> > because of the abuse of their father. A lot of pent up anger and
> > frustration,
> > medical problems out the wahzoo (near death even), and a general
> > social
> > deprivation. People tend to walk away from people with problems. On
> > top of that
> > comes this "culture shock" and "homesickness", a little "jet lag"
> > here and there
> > and lot's of depression.
> >
> > I don't want to anger anyone, harm anyowe, or be in anyone's way. I
> > just need some
> > help. I just need some mercy.
> >
> > Oh well...
> >
> > Just one more question. I hope someone has the answer.
> >
> > Can I fly to the USA awaiting my pending K-1?
> >
> > It would be costly, but PERFECTLY legal, _if_ I can fly there
> > legally...
>
> uhm, probably not... However, the wait isn't THAT long.
My fiance and I were considering going this route. We were even advised
by an immigration attorney that it's easier to just get married on the
visa waiver program then change status. However, I've recently heard
some horror stories of people who have done this. True, a lot that are
obviously in love get through, but many do not. Those who do not are
deported and can be banned from even visiting the US for years.
At first we wanted to be together quickly, at any cost, but now that we
think about it, it's worth waiting the 6 to 9 months now... god forbid
he was deported. You could be perfect in every way, but it all comes
down to an immigration officer and what kind of day he or she has had.
It doesn't seem fair, but when you think about all scum these laws keep
out of the country it is. If everyone skipped the K-1 and married on the
visa waiver, eventually the visa waiver would be obliterated. That's not
fair to anyone.
FYI as well, in order to moniter people marrying on the vwp a lot of
courthouses are only granting marriage licenses to people with approved
K-1 Visas or social security numbers. I know my local courthouse here in
southeastern PA is doing this, so when we considered the idea we had to
consider flying to Vegas...and that's even more money.
Just think clearly, you love this person with all your heart so think
about having a future with them. It hurts, but it will be worth it in
the end if you do things legally. Good luck.
--
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