Gointothai wrote:
> Thank you
> Are you in Canada or US and did you find it easy to immigrate?
> did you marry prior to coming over or after?
> which is better.
> I have a very strong family and they will welcome her unconditionally
and
> make her one of us. But I do not want her to feel to out of touch
with her
> family either, is there any difference between the first daughter and
the
> 2nd (she is 2nd) and there responsibility to them.
> "Noi" wrote in message
> news:1108527999.786315.154830@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
Are you in Canada or US and did you find it easy to immigrate?
***I am living in the U.S. I am not sure about easy to immigrate, for
me it was a mindset and made up my mind that U.S. will be my new home.
I met my husband just before I graduated from a University in the U.S.
did you marry prior to coming over or after? which is better. I have a
very strong family and they will welcome her unconditionally and make
her one of us. But I do not want her to feel to out of touch with her
family either, is there any difference between the first daughter and
the 2nd (she is 2nd) and there responsibility to them.
*** Sorry, I can't really answer that question since I am the only
child in my family, and a very independent person at that.
Noi
> Gointothai wrote:
> > Interesting I am also involved with a Thai Girl and would like to
> bring her
> > home (Canada) but I am concerned that the culture shock could be
too
> great.
> > any thoughts on this. My living in Thailand is not a real
possibility
> as I
> > am still relatively young and need to continue to build my massive
> wealth
> > (as im sure all of you have JK)
>
> ****Like any good relationships, honesty and good communication is a
> must. However, for a couple with cross culture, you multiply the
> difficulty by four! My suggestion for your situation is, make sure
> that you explain the enormous differences between Canada and Thailand
> to her thoroughly. The most difficult thing for her would be home
> sick, when you see the home sick signs from her, encourage her to
call
> her family. The first six months will be very tough for her.
> Encourage her to keep busy and educating herself about Canada as much
> as possible. Personally, I wouldn't worry too much about introducing
> her to Thai people in your area. The first few years she needs to
> learn to adjust to her new environment as quickly as possible. The
> other thing you may need to keep an eye on is the Seasonal Affective
> Disorder. If you have any specific questions please feel free to ask
> me.
>
> Noi
> > "six-toes" wrote in message
> > news:1108410123.411229.152790@g14g2000cwa.googlegroups.com...
> > Thai-ing the knot
> > OLIVER ROSE takes a look at why British men are beating a path to
> > Thailand in search of a Thai wife.
> >
> > ThAI women are noted for their warmth, beauty, grace, charm and
> > loyalty. Perhaps that's why so many British men find them
> > irresistible. In many cases, that longing translates into marriage.
> > This is now such a common practice that the Land of Smiles must
> surely
> > lead the way in global dating. It's a modern social phenomenon.
> >
> > Availability
> >
> > So many Thai women are in or have escaped unhappy marriages. They
> have
> > a fantasy that things will be better with a farang (foreigner).
This
> is
> > enhanced by the mutual availability of unhappily married or lonely,
> > single Western men.
> >
> > Not all men who beat the hot trail to Thailand seek simple
> > gratification in the bars of Bangkok or Pattaya. They are looking
for
> > something better, a loving and beautiful wife.
> >
> > Myths and illusions
> >
> > Western men go for Thai women because they know how to take care of
> > their husbands . . . but there can be pitfalls. - Picture by K.T.
GOH
> > The Western woman has given up the idea of being a devoted
housewife
> > and so the farang believes the Thai lady will do a much better job
of
> > looking after his needs. Indeed, she probably will as she has been
> > brought up to take care of her husband and keep the house in order.
> >
> > Even when Thai women work, they are still happy to look after their
> > men. In fact, the concept of a Western-style marriage is rather
new.
> > This may explain the philandering spirit of many Thai men, known by
> > their womenfolk as butterflies. But the whole game of dating
> > Thailand's beautiful women can be fraught with illusion and
> > misunderstanding.
> >
> > Many Western men come to Thailand knowing nothing of Thai culture
and
> > takes little trouble to find out. He heads straight for the bars
and
> > then makes a messy business of marrying a bar girl.
> >
> > He takes her back to his country where, in many cases, she feels
like
> a
> > fish out of water. And then he's surprised when his whole house is
> > taken over by her family. For Thais, loyalty to the family is
> paramount
> > and sometimes the unsuspecting farang husband can become
overwhelmed
> by
> > it.
> >
> > Happy with older men
> >
> > Another reason the farang heads for Thailand to find a wife is
> because
> > he has heard that Thai women are happy with older men. I know a
> > delightful Englishman in his mid-60s who is happily married to a
> young
> > lady half his age. This marriage is working because he has taken
> > enormous trouble to learn about Thai culture and to develop his
> > relationship with compassion and understanding. It helps, too, that
> > they now live in Thailand.
> >
> > In fact, a Western-Thai relationship will only work if the farang
> > mellows his harsh Western ways and bows to the Thai way of doing
> > things. If not, he will get very frustrated. Openness and patience
> are
> > essential . . . never show your anger.
> >
> > One argumentative 60-something Yorkshire man was surprised when he
> was
> > confronted by his wife with a knife in her hands. He thought it was
> > time to wind up the marriage there and then. It was never going to
> > work.
> >
> > Marriage is about more than .
> >
> > Falling in love is about .ual chemistry and, of course, one of
the
> > great attractions is the misconception that Thai women are .ually
> > free. Yet, although Thailand is a free and easy society on the
> surface,
> > not all is as it seems.
> >
> > Few eligible Thai women are bar girls whose economic circumstances
> > force them to exchange money for .. The farang, who thinks that
the
> > average Thai lady will bed down with him on their first date, is in
> for
> > a rude awakening.
> >
> > Take the case of the young Thai lady who arrived at London Airport,
> > having been matched with a Brit, only to discover that her new man
> > wanted to have . even before he got her home. She fled in disgust
> to
> > the agent who desperately tried to find her another partner. So
much
> > for cross-cultural understanding.
> >
> > Money misunderstandings
> >
> > Money. This is probably the biggest cause of all misunderstanding.
> The
> > exchange rates make the farang appear a rich man when he is in
> Thailand
> > and the Thai lady is often deceived by this illusion of wealth.
> Little
> > does she realise that, back in his own country, where the cost of
> > living may be three or four times as much, her man has a very
> ordinary
> > income.
> >
> > In addition, many Thai ladies have a simplistic idea of how to use
> > money: they believe that, if it's there, it's to be spent; no
> > budgeting, no saving. And, credit cards, well, they can be lethal.
> >
> > There was the German who married a Thai and was posted to North
Korea
> > while she remained in Bangkok. He made the mistake of leaving her
> with
> > his credit card and was then surprised when his German bank phoned
> him
> > and asked why he was =A320,000 (RM140,000) overdrawn.
> >
> > End of marriage. Yet, who was to blame?
> >
> > Where you have the heady combination of infatuation and money,
there
> > lies a recipe for many a tragicomic story.
> >
> > Take the case of the Briton, a married man with a family back home,
> who
> > visited Thailand and fell in love with a beautiful Chiang Mai girl.
> > When he returned to the UK, he gave her an allowance of =A31,500 a
> > month.
> >
> > Well, don't be surprised that it went to her head and she began to
> > ask for more. There he was, paying her all this money and trying to
> > make ends meet in the most expensive country in the European Union.
> >
> > And, when a friend suggested he should fly out to resolve the
> > situation, the silly man had to explain that he no longer had
enough
> > money to pay for an air ticket.
> >
> > Patience is a virtue
> >
> > A cross-cultural relationship is full of hurdles that need to be
> jumped
> > with care. If not, the fall can be heavy. At the start, there is so
> > much myth and illusion that need to be swept away before any normal
> > relationship can begin.
> >
> > A wise American friend of mine took two years to woo his Thai lady
> and
> > it has taken a further five difficult years to make it a successful
> > one.
> >
> > There's a lesson in that. W
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