Hi George,
We can definitely "agree to disagree" on this one!! But, you are right
that many passengers invited to parties or dinner with the Captain or
the officers have no idea of how to behave, or how to talk to the
people who invited them!! Love your comparison to a "chug-a-lug
contest in formal clothes"--all to true!!
For those who are interested, the best questions to ask of any officer
(or especially the Master) are about their careers--especially the
ships they have served on in the past. These guys adore to discuss
their vessels and the experiences they have had on them. They also
love it when you chime in that you have either sailed on such and such
a ship, or one of her sisters, or the same ship when she was under a
former name.....That invariably gets the ball rolling into some
fabulous stories and the conversation just flows on from there!!
Captains are also very interested when you have sailed on other ships
of the same line and have impressions or variations to point out (for
goodness sake, DO NOT say how much you liked the other ship better for
x, y and z reasons!--you'll put the kybosh on the whole evening!!). I
keep a running list for each ship that we have been on--ship name,
sailing date, cabin number, Master/Staff Captain/Other Officers,
itinerary and special notes on various events or things that
happened--just to spark my own memory of the vessel and the particular
cruise. The list is now organized by company with a time sequence
summary on top--just so I can keep it all straight!! These days, all I
have to do is to pull out that list, and the conversation just
blossoms!! What was an opportunity to chat briefly with the Master and
Staff Captain on our one night to nowhere on the Spirit turned into an
hour's conversation--and even then they wanted to chat some more later
that same evening--which has now turned into a standing invite to
dinner next summer!!! The Captains are also delighted when you
understand their company, its administration and can compare it to
others--past and present. "Gossip" is ALWAYS welcome in just about
any form!!
Captains also enjoy talking about their families, but be careful to be
brief here--these guys are often homesick for their loved ones,
although the availability of e-mail and fax nowadays really helps
them. Older children of the Officers are easier to deal with, since
one can delve into edcuational opportunities and what the children are
planning for careers, etc..... As a teacher, I am often brave enough
to go into the Science education of any Captain's young children, and
offer to help with edcuational materials for them either when they
are at home or when they are sailing with their Dad on the ship. The
Captains ADORE this sort of thing. Just be sure that you can follow
through to actually produce literature, labs, books, etc... that you
offer to be of help for the kids!! Some of our most dear Officer
friendships (that have withstood the test of time for many years) are
those with Captains where we have been able to send them things to
home school their children on board, or provide educational materials
that the kids can do at home even when they are at sea. Most of these
men have had a long educational pathway themselves, and they are
invariably concerned that the children somehow manage to receive the
same despite their careers and the many months that they are away from
home.
Questions to AVOID at all costs include the "where are you from?"--it
is written on the guy's name tag, usually with a little national flag
next to it! The one exception to this rule is if you have been to
the country and can speak knowledgeably about your own travels in his
land of origin, and what a wonderful time you had seeing........ and
"why did you choose this career path?". since most of these guys were
in either freight, fishing or the navy of their home land. I have yet
to meet a single officer who told me that he just wanted to beome a
cruise ship Captain because it seemed like a good idea!! Questions
about the weather are often good openers, but be careful since these
can lead you into bad weather stories that tend to go on for ever!!
Don't bring up rogue waves either--the Captains consider it to be bad
luck!!
Thanks for the GGC plug--one of these fine days, perhaps Derek and I
really will be able to go on one and meet everybody!!
Bestest,
Peg
On Wed, 12 Sep 2007 09:16:18 -0500, "George Leppla"
wrote:
>
>"Peg Caldwell-Ott" wrote
>
>> I enjoy being at the Captain's Table, or
>> being invited to visit the Bridge, or finding a bottle of wine or an
>> appetizer in my cabin with a little card that tells me someone on
>> board still cares!!! I am used to it and I expect it. To me, that is
>> a VERY large part of what a voyage is all about!!!
>
>While I understand the way you feel, my feelings about this are totally
>different.
>
>I have turned down way more offers for "dinner with the captain" than I ever
>accepted. I am usually traveling with friends and I don't get to see them
>that often so I like the time we have together. I find "captain's dinners"
>to be a bit stultifying. How much fun can it be for the ship's officers to
>answer the same questions every week... week in and week out? Where are you
>from... how did you end up choosing your career.... do you miss your family.
>
>On one cruise a few years ago, I accepted the invitation to the Captain's
>table on condition that my entire dining table be invited. Imagine my
>surprise when that happened. It was fun... but face it, how much
>conversation can you have at a table for 14? You can't hear half the people
>you are sitting with.
>
>One other memorable cruise I accepted an invitation to a private cocktail
>party in the Captain's quarters. Nice.... about 30 people, milling about,
>chugging free drinks as fast as possible and making small talk with
>strangers.
>
>(OK... this is a personal phobia and peeve of mine. It seems that at any
>Captain's Party with free drinks, many people act like they have never seen
>alcohol before and have to gulp down as many drinks as possible in the
>shortest period of time. If these parties are supposed to be "elegant and
>sophisticated", why do they more resemble a college chug-a-lug contest in
>formal clothes?)
>
>When you stay in a hotel for a week, few people expect to be invited to dine
>with the hotel manager. If you purchase a one week tour package to
>DisneyWorld, you don't expect to meet and socialize with any of the property
>management. I guess the closest thing would be to have your picture taken
>with Mickey Mouse... instead of the Captain.
>
>I guess I am more of a "modern" cruiser rather than a "traditional ocean
>liner" type of person.
>
>BTW - it is good to see Peg posting again. For those who weren't around
>years ago, Peg was one of the driving forces behind the organization for the
>first GGC.
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