On Sun, 14 Dec 2003 20:25:18 -0600, "cinnamonsmom"
wrote:
>can someone give me some insight. i am anglo from the u.s. married, happy, speak enough spanish to get by, but not fluent. met a guy from nigaragua speaks no english, here working, trying to send money home, also married. He has started making suggestions that we could hook up, like neither spouse has to know, and we could just have our own thing on the side. I could not so that to my husband, but it seems like he doen't have the same dedication to his wife. thoughts??
My wife is Mexican, and I can tell you from first-hand knowledge (not
her, but her family's doings) that MANY Latino men who are married
have girlfriends on the side. It is not even uncommon for them to
spend a great deal of time with their girlfriend, sometimes they even
set them up in a house, and have other children with them. And many
times the wife and her family know all about it and althought they do
not like it, they accept it. Even though they are VERY Catholic. In
other words, it is against their religion to divorce, but not to
cheat... Well, technically it IS wrong to cheat, but it is accepted,
whereas divorce is not. However, in my wife's family, they told their
daughter in law that if she wants to divorce from their son and get a
new husband, they would not blame her. But she doesn't do it.
This is why my wife decided not to marry a Latino man.
Many Latino men think it is fine to have a woman on the side, and it
is "accepted" - if not liked - in their culture.
So yes, he can still love his wife and children and want to fool
around with you. You should explain to him that here it is grounds for
divorce and not at all acceptable. |